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BC talks about sex and spirit

By Gaveliers, The Gavel Media Team, on November 4, 2009 11:02 PM

By Emma Staffaroni, For the Gavel -

Boston College students and faculty piled into McGuinn 121 Tuesday night for a panel consisting of Jesuits, a campus minister, the coordinator of the Women’s Resource Center, and a theology professor. With every seat filled, the audience even spilled into the aisles. “I know why you’re all here,” Fr. Jack Butler said. “It’s because we’re talking about sex.”

The panel “Sex and the Spirit: Conversations about Sexuality and Intimacy in the Catholic Tradition” invited members of the BC faculty and administration to start dialogue on campus to increase awareness about sex, sexuality, and sexual health, according to Scott Jelinek, co-founder of BC Students for Sexual Health and A&S ’10.

Inscribed in the campus-wide “Love Your Body Week,” “Sex and the Spirit” would speak to what Alicia Johnson, co-founder of BCSSH and A&S ’11, sees as a greater discussion of identity. “Sexuality is so vital to our identity and, like body image, it is one part of how we see ourselves as whole people.” The panel’s purpose was two-fold: first, to begin to clarify for students how spirituality—Catholic, Jesuit spirituality in particular—dictates values around sex and sexuality; and second, to start to bridge the gap between university administration’s policies and students’ realities.

For Jesuits like Fr. Joe Marchese, this means that authority figures cannot dictate rules from above. “We need to work from the bottom up,” Marchese said.

Sheila McMahon, head of the WRC and a recent BC graduate, spoke to the realities of students. She recalled her personal feelings of detachment from the intellectual or authoritative nature of talks about sex on campus. A lack of reflection and knowledge creates clashes between sex and the spirit. She identified the “hook-up culture,” which transforms sex into a commodity as one consequence. “Like its name—‘hook-up’—you literally plug in, get what you want, and you’re done,” McMahon said.

Spiritually, agreed the panelists, much is lost in that experience. “Starting the conversation at sex is like starting in the middle of a mystery novel,” Butler said. To him, it has to start with mutual love and respect. Marchese pointed out that as students who show respect for people through volunteering on service trips, students might consider how much respect they have for the person with whom they have sexual relations. As a tenet of Jesuit education, the University seeks to educate the “cura personalis,” or the whole person. In respecting each other as whole people, the panelists said, students might begin to understand the ethics that inform specific Catholic doctrines about sex and sexuality.

Another topic on students’ minds that attended the panel was when sexual relations is a sin. According to Lisa Cahill of the theology department, “Sex is moral when it is loving and when it respects its procreative potential.” In that light, she explained, the Church does not permit the use of artificial birth control as a form of limitation to the possibility of parenthood. Cahill made the point, though, that the Church does not rule out natural forms of birth control, such as rhythm methods. She also explained that marriage is the Church’s only recognized institution of committed love.

This emphasis on procreation and marriage denotes compulsory heterosexuality. The Church, according to Cahill, urges homosexual people to live a celibate life. When the panelists were later asked what kinds of resources BC provides for students who identify as GLBTQ, McMahon mentioned discussion groups and counseling services. Marchese described his goal to affirm individuals in the GLBTQ community while upholding institutional integrity.

Cahill also presented a feminist critique of Catholic teachings on sex. Traditionally regarded as subordinate to men, women’s affirmed goal was to be mothers, according to Cahill. Without a viewpoint that includes reliable ways to avoid pregnancy and birth, she noted, the Church keeps women at this unequal status.  In spite of these criticisms, the theology professor added, Catholic ideas about preserving the integrity of sexual partners are extremely relevant.

Butler stated that sex is a gift from God that the Church to protect. He cautioned that when sex is used incorrectly, it can bring about destruction and shame.

Tammy Liddell of Campus Ministry expressed that this shame and regret can often be attributed to the correlation between drinking alcohol and hooking up. In her work as a campus minister, she has seen students combat these behaviors with open discussions about their choices with their close peer group. “They then started to look out for each other,” she said. “As someone’s friend, you know who they want to be…it is our responsibility to hold them accountable…in a loving way.”

Of the anonymously composed questions posed at the panel, only a select few were answered. When asked, “What’s next?” the panelists affirmed a need for more intimate dialogue within small groups of students, perhaps in residence halls. Johnson said she is collaborating with the Office of Residential Life and Campus Ministry to create these spaces, which will focus on student expression as a means to bridge the gap between school policy and actual student needs.

For Jelinek, the panel was a good first step, but it did not cover all aspects of the issue. “They left some questions about school policy unanswered,” he said. He envisions a policy-centered panel in the future.

Tim Tremba, A&S ’10, was impressed with the panel. “Even though my own views differ, it was great to hear from intelligent individuals about the reasoning behind their beliefs,” he said.