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Peers lend ear, give advice on queer student issues

By Tue Tran, Editor-in-Chief Emeritus, on December 7, 2009 8:21 PM

By Tue Tran, Co-Editor-in-Chief -

Same-sex marriage is currently a hot-button issue throughout the United States. But simply being gay and coming to terms with this part of one’s identity can be tough. At Boston College, the GLBTQ Leadership Council (GLC) is aware of the difficulties and has officially launched Queer Peers, an organization that aims to help those grappling with issues of being gay.

The foundation of Queer Peers is as a peer support system, according to Tony Jennaro, Director of Queer Peers and A&S ’10. With training from Counseling Services, the “queer peers” provide confidential, one-on-one conversations for those in need of advice or simply an ear.

“Talking about the issue — any issue, for that matter — is the best step to take in ameliorating any conflict,” Kelsey Gasseling, President of the GLBTQ Leadership Council and A&S ’11, said. “By nature of their relation to human sexuality, GLBTQ issues are incredibly personal and difficult to address at times.”

GLC members believe that this organization needs to exist because there has been no place where GLBTQ can come to privately talk about their sexuality and know that they are among peers who understand the intricacies of their situation.

“We are simply students trying to fill a gap in the University’s support system,” Jennaro said. “There are no explicitly safe spaces for GLBTQ students at BC, so we are trying to provide one.”

Scott Molony, A&S ’11, who came out as gay in his freshman year, found that coming out was hard, but having a peer to talk to made the process go more smoothly.

“[Coming out] feels exceptionally difficult,” Molony said. “I promised I would never forget how difficult. But once done, it felt good. It didn’t make everything right, right away. But being able to speak to someone about it was a marvelous help.”

When Jennaro first came out at BC, he felt alone in his struggles.

“The biggest challenge, particularly when I was in the closet and coming out, is that there is generally a closeted atmosphere at BC,” Jennaro said. “I did not know, really, any queer students, and that is a challenge to not be able to identify with anyone.”

Now, both Jennaro and Molony are queer peers who give to others the support they could have used. There are currently approximately 15 queer peers, and they all have different areas of interest.

“We have a number of different people,” Molony said. “And they can talk about different aspects about being gay.”

Molony felt that he can add to the conversation by being gay and Catholic. “Faith has been an important part of my life,” Molony said. “And having someone who is Catholic talk about it can be very helpful.”

But Queer Peers is not only for queer students who are coming out, but also for heterosexual students who are dealing with GLBTQ issues. “Our hope is to be available conversation partners for any student with questions, whether they are speaking about themselves, friends, family members, or just wish to learn more about the issue in general,” Gasseling said.

The organization also hopes to promote dialogue on campus. “Much effort has been put, and rightly so, to dialoguing with the administration,” Jennaro said. “However, the general student body, while often represented as relatively accepting, does not engage in conversation surrounding GLBTQ identity. So much of our efforts as a group is to break through this silence… which will empower students and allies to talk about issues of sexuality and gender identity.”

To do this, Queer Peers has a Safe Spaces campaign. The initiative calls for student organizations and individuals to commit to creating safe spaces in their dorm or office with a presentation and discussion facilitated by a queer peer to examine various GLBTQ issues and what a “safe space” might entail.

Queer Peers, though, is not only focusing on students. The GLBTQ Mentorship Program will foster dialogue between undergraduate students in the GLC and Queer Peers and those in the Lesbian and Gay Faculty, Staff and Administrators Association (LGFSAA).

Navigating BC culture as a GLBTQ student can be complicated.

“This is the biggest shame,” Jennaro said. “One’s four years of college should be a time to come into one’s identity, to discover fully who they are, but the environment at BC does not facilitate this for GLBTQ students.”

But Jennaro added that BC has improved, and he said that Queer Peers will aid in this.

“It is not fair simply to paint a picture of BC as a completely closeted and homophobic place, since we are progressing,” Jennaro said. “And hopefully the efforts of queer peers will help create an atmosphere where more people can fully live out their identities and be themselves.”
For those struggling to come out, Molony said that he has been there and understands. “But,” he said, “there’s life, there’s hope, and the anguish of the closet need not be.”

Queer Peers holds office hours in the Women’s Resource Center in McElroy 141.