Opinion: A girl's perspective on FIFA '13

I skip out of my 12 p.m. class because I’m excited for the two-hour nap I’m going to take before my next class. All I can think about is my comfy, inviting bed and making a cocoon out of my blankets. As I settle in to take my glorious nap, I hear it. I hear the sound that makes me want to punch a hole in the wall. I hear the boys on my floor screaming “OHHHH!!!....YEAHHHH!!!!” This yell of excitement sounds like a reaction of someone finding physical evidence that Santa does in fact exist. But no, this shout is for making or missing a goal in a virtual soccer game.

Before you think that I’m about to rant about the stupidity of FIFA ’13, hold your horses, my dear readers. I have a younger brother who played nothing but FIFA ’12 this past summer break, and trust me, I know how important it is to you guys. Also, I see the appeal in the game: you get to pick and play as your favorite soccer team and have bro bonding time without actually having to get out of your comfy chair or having a legitimate conversation. To be honest, I don’t really have a problem with the game itself; there are just things I don’t understand when it comes to the boys playing the game.

Firstly, I don’t understand how you can play this game hour after hour, day after day. There is absolutely no plot in this game. It’s not like it’s based on a specific character trying to figure out his soccer career and going to play on different teams. I get playing games like “Assassin’s Creed,” “Left 4 Dead” or “Uncharted” that have some sort of a plot that makes it interesting to follow along, but as for kicking a ball around by pressing buttons on a game controller, not so much -- especially not for multiple hours per day.

And secondly, I don’t understand why boys overreact when they make or miss a goal. I understand the “Aw man!!” or “Gosh darn it,” but I don’t get the insane amount of “Oh!!!!!”s or “Yeah!!!!!”s. It’s not like you discovered the cure to cancer, or were dissed beyond recovery. It’s just a game, you’re not risking your life, so please calm down before you pop a blood vessel.

I’ve tried to play FIFA ’13 and I physically could not sit there for more than one round of the game. Maybe I’m missing something that only boys know, a secret ritual of bro bonding time. Or maybe it’s because I’m not knowledgeable of the game. Whatever the case, FIFA ’13 is going to be around for a while, so I might as well invest in a pair of earplugs for my midday naps.

 

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