Kate McCabe / Gavel Media

Mouse Hunters: BC Edition

Good evening and welcome to House Hunters! Today we are joined by our lovely newlywed mouse couple, George and Georgina. They recently moved from the inner city and are looking for a place to settle down and start a family in Chestnut Hill. George is an artisanal cheese taster and Georgina is a burgeoning YouTube influencer. Their budget is $72,000 and they are hoping to make their dreams come true in their ideal location: Boston College. Their wish list includes a backyard for the kids to play in, minimal mouse traps, and a location near great restaurants for date night! Let’s start looking at their options.

To start off and give you a baseline for your options, please allow me to introduce you to Walsh. This bustling apartment building is a vintage fixer-upper. It hasn’t been touched in terms of renovations since the 1980s, so you’ll find charming details like peeling paint, putrid wall colors, and broken bathtubs that give the building that certain ~je ne sais quoi~. The building has an active nightlife for all your nocturnal needs, in-home laundry, and an elevator for easy access to your friendly mouse neighbors. The best news…it’s under budget! With the money you save, you can buy a basic tapestry and pretend it does anything to cover up the filth of your humble abode! You better act quick if you’re interested. I hear this building is almost at its rat capacity, but with me as your realtor, I bet I can make something work.

Now this one I’m really excited about! Georgina, I know how much luxury means to you so I want to introduce you to a new market listing: the Margot Connell Recreation Center. This brand-new complex is filled with everything you could ever want: air conditioning, sport courts, towel service, and pool and spa access. The waterfront reservoir property is a stunner sure to satisfy your every need. There is even gated key card access emphasizing its safety and exclusivity. With an in-house gym, you can work on avoiding that dad mouse bod, am I right George? I know, I know, seems a bit too good to be true, and it is. This building comes in slightly over budget at about $150 million. But you never know when Georgina’s YouTube career will kick-off!

The last location we’ll be looking at is in a young up and coming neighborhood and is right at budget: McElroy Commons. Now I know what you’re thinking George, this place is filled with freshmen, disillusioned sophomores, and garbage. It’s perfect! The building has recently renovated details, and it is filled with natural light to help you find tiny holes in the wall for easy access. There is also a hot spot food scene. Shorter lines and late-night chicken tenders will keep you and Georgina well-fed and happy. They even separate the trash from the leftover food for you in a conveniently labeled compost bin. Could it get any better?!

I hate to say it, but it’s that time. Now that you’ve seen all three listings, you have to make your decision. What are you going to do?

Commercial Break: 2 for 1 sale Blue-Magic Mouse Glue Traps (with peanut scent). Don’t let rodents get you down! Call Rat’s All Folks exterminators for all your pest needs.

Okay, George and Georgina, have you made your decision?

**Mouse squeaks**

Translation: Yes! After much deliberation, Georgina and George have decided to go for Walsh! They figure saving a little money will help, especially with 12 kids on the way! The couple can’t wait to meet all of their new neighbors.

Excellent! Congratulations on your new home! Another couple housed and happy! Join us next week on House Hunters when we help the skunk living under the mods move upcampus to the O’Connell House.

Iced coffee with oat milk and a sausage egg and cheese extra cheese.