Allison Jones / Gavel Media

Conversations With a Republican Parent at Thanksgiving

The Gavel
Allison Jones / Gavel Media
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Trump’s win divided two things this month: the nation and my family group chat. And as everyone knows, nothing pairs better with Turkey than a side of political tension during the family Thanksgiving dinner. While my mom and I were canvassing for climate policies and reproductive rights, my Republican father texted me an AI-generated picture of Trump with angel wings, convinced that he was going to save the nation. It was not just democracy on the ballot—it was my patience.

It’s a strange kind of heartbreak, loving a parent so much who is actively voting against your rights and calling it patriotism. I want to believe my Dad has good intentions—deep down, he is the same person who taught me how to ride a bike and encouraged me to believe that I could do anything I want to do in life as a woman. But then he turns around and casts a vote to strip away freedoms I believe are fundamental, and suddenly, I’m stuck wondering how someone so brilliant in so many aspects of life can be so willfully ignorant about inequalities throughout America.

It’s not just the disagreements but a refusal to learn. Explaining basic facts feels like shouting into the void, except the void has Fox News on in the background and interrupts with, “Well, actually.” I’ve tried reasoning, I’ve tried empathy. Nothing works. He will roll his eyes, then send me a Facebook Reel about voter fraud the next day. 

And the worst part? He doesn’t see it. He doesn’t see how his vote chips away at the life I want to build or the future I’m fighting for. To him, it’s all theoretical—a box checked in the name of ‘freedom’ and ‘tradition’ and a desperate grasp at a ‘better economy’ that will worsen under Trump. But for me, it’s real. His ‘values’ mean fewer rights for my friends, a more brutal fight for climate action, and a government that looks more like a country club than a democracy. And when I point this out, he hits me with the classic: ‘We can agree to disagree’, as if civil rights are just another item on the Thanksgiving menu we can politely pass over.

But how do you politely disagree with someone voting for policies that harm you and people you love? How do you stay calm when the person who has been such a wonderful father your entire life shrugs off the struggles of entire communities? It’s not just frustrating—it’s infuriating. I want to scream, to shake him, to ask, ‘How can you not see what you’re doing?’ Instead, I roll my eyes and pass the mashed potatoes because arguing over dinner never works when one side brings feelings, and the other brings Tucker Carlson’s talking points.

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